Written on June 12, 2015
There are times in my life when doors get slammed in my face one right after the other and I don't understand why. Its during those times that I feel like God is a million miles away. I have been going through one of those times lately. Those of you who are in my inner circle know what I'm talking about so I won't give all the details here. There also stolen moments when I say little, silent prayers or thoughts to God that no one ever knows about but me and Him. Most of the time I move on and I don't think about the prayers much because the clamor of the world distracts me; but these are the deepest, secret desires in my heart that seem like the most impossible to ever attain.
My Higher Power tends to have a sense of humor in my life and He confuses the hell out of me with His timing. It seems He's very, very slow yet always on time. He never ceases to amaze me, usually at the worst of times, to remind me that He's still there. A couple of days ago was one of those times.
One of my deepest, dearest friends is Gail. She has been my sponser, mentor, confidante, friend and cheerleader for 17 years. We met through our mutual friend Bill W. She has been the voice on the other end of the phone and literally saved my life the night my grandson died. We used to go every week or two and have a cup of coffee and talk about everything and nothing all at once. We have ridden the storms of life out together. She has loved me unconditionally and given me hope when I had none. She was the one that inspired me to follow my dreams of a degree in art. To say that I love her is a huge understatement. I owe her my life and I will be forever grateful that God made our paths meet.
Her husband Ken, whom I loved dearly too, died several years ago and she moved to another state to be closer to her daughter and grandchildren. We have talked on the phone ever since. One of those little, silent prayers that I said to God was that I would get to see her face to face again because I miss her so much.
So, here I am tripping through my life getting doors slammed in my face, not knowing which way to turn and thinking God has forgotten me. Then, earlier this week Gail called and said, "I'm in Oklahoma City do you want to come and go to the art museum with me?" Of course I did that's a no brainer! So we met up the next day at the Oklahoma City Museum of Art. She's an artist just like me and neither of us could rush through any piece of artwork. I had the most wonderful time I've had in a very long time. We each talked about the images before us and talked about life and talked about nothing all at the same time again. There was one moment during our tour that I was watching her when she wasn't watching me and I was reminded of my little, silent prayer to God. What a holy, sacred moment that was. Here at one of the scariest, most difficult times in my life God brought me an angel in the flesh.
I am so grateful for those moments when God blows my mind and gives unmerited grace. I am even more grateful for the people like Gail that He puts in my life. They are my precious treasures in the world.
I love you Gail and I'm so blessed to have had a day with you. Thank you for giving that to me!!