Jul 12, 2010

Sitting Here

by Andrea Tadpole

Sitting here
Twisting, grinding in my mind
Trying to determine
Where to go and what to do

Paralyzed by fear
Without even a clue
Sorrow overwhelms me
It seems my life is through

Once I was an optimist
The skies were always blue
Now I am a pessimist
I just don't know what's true

I try to do the right thing
I love deeply
Give my all
To those that are around me
Never blowing my own horn

Yet when my feet falter
When I’m feeble and forlorn
There's no one there to help
Or even catch me when I fall

I have no motivation
No passion left within
My heart is hammered dog meat
Disillusionment my best friend
I'm empty and broken
Often wishing for the end

Then for a brief moment
I stop my mind and search
For someone who really loves me
Just for me
The way I am

Suddenly my little Destiny's face
Appears inside my mind
Her ornery smile
Her flashing eyes
Her laughter that fills air

In a brief second of eternity
I find a flimsy reed to which I cling
It keeps my head above the waves
Till I reach the shore again

See, it’s in the hearts of children
That grandparents are found
They live forever in their memories
For that's where love abounds

Finally I dry my eyes
Get up and start anew

I remember that my purpose
Lies in planting seeds
In the hearts of my grandchildren
And there's much work left to do

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