I wrote this for my friend Stella DeVille on May 14, 1993 at 8:40pm CST in Sulphur Springs, AR while at a women’s AA retreat. I have tried to find it many times over the years to give to her again but I never did. I prayed and asked God to show me where it was today and to my amazement found it. I guess I wasn’t supposed to find it till now. I loved Stella deeply. God gave me the honor of watching her come into AA, sober up and grow. I sponsored her for a while in the beginning and heard her 5th step. I have sat in many meetings with her over the past few years and she has taught me so much more than I ever did her. I will miss her and never forget her. Here is what I wrote so long ago about Stella:
I am sitting here on the porch watching the sun sink slowly behind the hills. Stella asked me to write something for her and about her. I have been thinking of what to write. It has to be inspirational. I feel so inadequate. I want to write something that will touch her spirit. I keep “trying” to come up with something. I know when I let go, God will write through me. I just need to get out of the way. One of my greatest desires is to be a writer – to publish a book. Is that ego or is that God? I am not sure. Time will tell.
Now back to Stella. What do I admire in Stella? I admire her sense of humor, her willingness, her passion; I love her little child within. I love to play with her and can read her eyes.
Her Eyes Give Her Away
by Andrea Tadpole
She tries to look so strong
Yet her eyes give her away
Her eyes say I’m scared and lonely
I don’t know where I fit
She’s been through tremendous pain
I wish I could take it away
I can’t
I watch her grow
I’ve seen her change
She doesn’t like to admit it
But she’s grown
Her eyes give her away
Today they say
I’VE SURVIVED
I’M ALIVE
Show me what to do
I need to learn to live
Her eyes are full of
Excitement
Uncertainty
Joy and pain
Today she can feel
And she can cry
The tears
Wash away the dirt
And heal the wounds
They give life clarity
And help things grow
She’s a beautiful lady
I love her
She’s my soulmate
She's my sister
And her eyes give her away
