by Andrea Tadpole
Lost in a fog
A daze
Of wasted time
And spent
Emotion
Trying to find
My way
But I'm blinded
By an
Ocean
Consumed with
Regrets
About what
Shoulda been
Fears
Of what
Could be
If only I could
Clear my mind
And find a
Guiding light
Maybe then
There'd be an
End to this long
Dark night
Then I would
Be free
From the ache
That's deep within
I could once
More embrace
My world
To rise and
Live again
A lot of people never knew what an awesome writer Michael Jackson was. His poetry and essays spoke volumes to me. Here is one of his essays that describes why I have been captivated by elephants for my entire life. Enjoy!
So The Elephants March
by Michael Jackson
A curious fact about elephants is this: In order to survive, they mustn't fall down. Every other animal can stumble and get back up again. But an elephant always stands up, even to sleep. If one of the herd slips and falls, it is helpless. It lies on its side, a prisoner of its own weight. Although the other elephants will press close around it in distress and try to lift it up again, there isn't usually much they can do. With slow heaving breaths, the fallen elephant dies. The others stand vigil, then slowly move on.
This is what I learned from nature books, but I wonder if they are right. Isn't there another reason why elephants can't fall down? Perhaps they have decided not to. Not to fall down is their mission.
As the wisest and most patient of the animals, they made a pact -- I imagine it was eons ago, when the ice ages were ending. Moving in great herds across the face of the earth, the elephants first spied tiny men prowling the tall grasses with their flint spears."What fear and anger this creature has," the elephants thought." But he is going to inherit the earth. We are wise enough to see that. Let us set an example for him."
Then the elephants put their grizzled heads together and pondered. What kind of example could they show to man? They could show him that their power was much greater that his, for that was certainly true. They could display their anger before him, which was terrible enough to uproot whole forests. Or they could lord it over man through fear, trampling his fields and crushing his huts. In moments of great frustration, wild elephants will do all of these things, but as a group, putting their heads together, they decided that man would learn best from a kinder message.
"Let us show him our reverence for life," they said. And from that day on, elephants have been silent, patient, peaceful creatures. They let men ride them and harness them like slaves. They permit children to laugh at their tricks in the circus, exiled from the great African plains where they once lived as lords.
But the elephants' most important message is in their movement. For they know that to live is to move. Dawn after dawn, age after age, the herds march on, one great mass of life that never falls down, an unstoppable force of peace.
Innocent animals, they do not suspect that after all this time, they will fall from a bullet by the thousands. They will lie in the dust, mutilated by our shameless greed. The great males fall first, so that their tusks can be made into trinkets. Then the females fall, so that men may have trophies.The babies run screaming from the smell of their own mothers' blood, but it does them no good to run from the guns. Silently, with no one to nurse them, they will die, too, and all their bones bleach in the sun. In the midst of so much death, the elephants could just give up. All they have to do is drop to the ground. That is enough. They don't need a bullet: Nature has given them the dignity to lie down and find their rest. But they remember their ancient pact and their pledge to us, which is sacred.
So the elephants march on, and every tread beats out words in the dust: "Watch, learn, love. Watch, learn, love." Can you hear them? One day in shame, the ghosts of ten thousand lords of the plains will say, "We do not hate you. Don't you see at last? We were willing to fall, so that you, dear small ones, will never fall again."
by Andrea Tadpole
I'm so tired of
Dancing all alone
I feel like my heart
Doesn't have
A home
I go out
On the weekends
To find release
In the rhythm
Of the beat
Hoping it will
Soothe the ache
Set me free
Yet I'm always
Reminded
That I'm
Dancing alone
When the slow dance
Comes
And I've no one
To hold
Its as if I'm
Invisible
Nobody sees
That I just want
A partner
To dance with me
I just need
Someone to
Hold on to
When life throws
Me for a spin
I don't know where
It begins or ends
And the answers
Don't come from within
Just need strong arms
To grasp me
Never let me go
Hold me through
The long dark night
When I feel alone
Find no strength within
Need an anchor
When storm clouds roll
Just be there
Hold me
Let me fall apart
With you
In your arms
I find the
Peace and strength
To stand up again
I sure hope I'm not included as one of those white devils in your diatribe. You know I'm not racist. While I agree with the spirit of what you are saying, African Americans are not the only race that has been disenfranchised in our nation's history.
Lets not forget the OUTRIGHT EXTERMINATION of Native Americans...all in the selfish pursuit of land. It breaks my heart to think that MY ANCESTORS died being forced to leave their homes and walk across this country in the dead of winter when the federal government took their homes away. Funny everyone so easily forgets that.
As for myself personally, I am disenfranchised and discriminated against every day by employers, government officials, businesses and individuals because I am disabled. Don't start preaching about ADA laws to me either. They are worthless because most officials refuse to enforce them. I am treated like a stupid deaf girl everywhere I turn. I could bring you to tears with stories of outright public humiliation I have endured. Yet when I have sought help by officials, attorneys, dept of justice, etc. NO ONE WAS THERE.
The reality is until we ALL drop our blinders and embrace the differences in everyone no matter what our race, religion, creed, sexual preference, disability or ability, class, etc we are still doomed. Until we drop our sad stories (me included), stop living in the past and UNITE for the future we will never get any better as a nation no matter who the president is.
Everyone is posting a daily thing they are thankful for on Facebook so I figured if you can't beat em join em...my thankful list all at once since I'm too busy to stop every day (I never follow the rules anyway)
1. God, AA and my sobriety
2. My daddy for being there for me
3. My son Sedrick Zelsnack. I only hope to be as wonderful as him when I grow up! Oh and his music is awesome :)
4. My daughter Alicia Zelsnack. She is beautiful, sweet and a awesome mother. I adore her!!
4. My granddaughter Destiny who has given me a reason to keep going when things get tough.
5. My granddaughter Kaylee who has shown me the true meaning of love.
6. My granddaughter Bella whose artwork makes my heart sing!
7. My granddaughter Courtney who always reminds me to laugh!
8. Old doors closing
9. New doors opening
10. A good job
11. My best friend Elaine Lamont. She has been a voice of wisdom and there when no one else was.
12. My new friend Lindsey Vandeventer. Can't wait to see what the future holds!
13. Music...the healing balm to my weary soul
14. Art...because it gives me a way to express myself
15. My sponsor Gail for hanging in there with me all these years!
16. My ex husbands for teaching me what I DON'T WANT in a relationship
17. Dancing...it has set my spirit free!
18. A place to live that's warm and safe. Some of my friends don't have that right now :(
19. Food to eat...this time last year I didn't have any.
20. Peace of mind and hope
21. Passion...life would be so boring without it!
22. Love...for without love none of the other stuff matters!
Happy Turkey Day to all!!
